Late this afternoon, I received a call from Dr. Keenan with the results from my second pregnancy blood test. Unfortunately, my hcg levels dropped to 6. While these little lives did indeed implant and try to grow, God had other plans for them. While we would have welcomed and loved two more, they now join our 7 others who are safe in the arms of Jesus. What a wonderful place to be!
While there is a measure of sadness, we have so very much to be thankful for.
1. That this journey is over. There is great relief that comes with tossing out all the needles and meds! I have literally been on hormone supplements for almost three years now. My body is quite ready to get back to normal. And after 8 adoption home studies and the emotional roller coaster that comes with all the unknowns, we are grateful to put this piece to rest.
2. The five precious blessing we have!!! If you would have asked me at any point in my pre-married life what I hoped for in my family, I would have always responded, "four little boys." Yup, believe it or not, that was my dream early on. God not only granted this desire, but added the cherry on top when He also gave us a little girl.
3. A clear conscience. We knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God wanted us to go back and get our remaining sibling embryo's. Even though they will not be in our earthly arms, we know that we did the right thing. Nothing compares to a clear conscience.
And so, this chapter of our lives comes to a close. We have NO REGRETS.
AMEN Babe!
ReplyDeleteAmen prayers to you all.
ReplyDeleteThis is so precious. I cry for you because I can only imagine the broken hearts you have at this time. I'm so blessed by your faith and obedience and love.
ReplyDeleteWell said! We love you all! So proud of you and the journey that you so gracefully endured for the Lord! You are a bright and shining light of love for everyone to see.
ReplyDeleteHeidi, I am just so glad you shared this news. I am so sorry for your loss, but thrilled for the perspective of joy God has given you at this time of grieving. A trio at church sang the FBS song, "You Have Dealt Bountifully," a couple of weeks ago and I just think of that song right now as I see your beautiful family. He has given you bountiful grief, but BOUNTIFUL joy as well. We have a bountiful God who gives us more than we could ask or imagine! Praise HIM for the testimony of faith you have because of your earthly trials. Thanks for sharing those trials so God's name can be glorified! Much love, Naomi
ReplyDeleteTHANKFUL with you for all God has done, is doing and will do through you and your little ones! He's not done with them - with this story of His faithfulness, how He has led and worked in you to bring you to obedience and trust. I know there is rejoicing in HIS plan in your lives…2 new littles on this side of heaven, or not. Praying for you as you transition and grieve - hormones are always a battle.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the update...
ReplyDeletewhat you wrote was beautiful!
((Hugs)), Love and Prayers!
Praising the Lord with you for His goodness in the way he has blessed and grown your family, & in that your babies are in His hands.
ReplyDeleteWhat a special testimony your family has and what precious children you have!
ReplyDeleteA beautiful end to this chapter of your life.
ReplyDeleteWell Done!! We love you all so much!!! What a joy it was as Grandma and Grandpa to be in your home and to babysit those precious ones while you were away.
ReplyDeleteDad Bjokne